unemployed for 1.5 yr after graduating, fired from two jobs and depressed

So I went to one of the best colleges in the US, with what I heard was a good design program, majored in design/computer art and minored in cognitive science. I did not utilize my resources well enough in college and did not do internships, but I did all the coursework and made cool projects. People told me I was talented, my teachers and peers liked my work so I thought I’d be fine. But I had a lot of trouble finding a job after graduating – it took me a year. I wasn’t grinding every day though, I was struggling a lot with an eating disorder (which I have since recovered from), other personal issues, and getting more and more depressed from unemployment and the lack of structure. I finally got a job, but I got fired after 4 days because it was too demanding and I wasn’t performing up to par in the first week, when I was still trying to learn the ropes. This job had many 1-star reviews on Glassdoor and the company culture was bad – they would micromanage and demean their workers. I was trying my best but I failed. Then, 5 months later I got another job at an ecommerce company. This job was very directionless and you were expected to do everything on your own. They gave me a 2 week trial period but I did not make the work they wanted from me and I appeared to be “confused” and “not knowing what to do” and didn’t appear to have enough of a “learning attitude”. I did try my best in the first week, showing up even on 3-5 hours of sleep the first week (adjustment insomnia) and 1.5hr commute but the lack of direction and lack of positive feedback made me lose motivation. I am not sure how to appear to have a learning attitude if asking questions makes me look like I don’t know what I’m doing…I do have a shy and reserved personality and am a coward and when I encounter failure I tend to internalize it and feel like I’m cooked.

I lost so much motivation that I just didn’t show up today and am writing this right now. Based on the feedback, I think it is highly unlikely that they would hire me anyway.

I am considering just throwing away the past 6 years of my life, starting over, and going the medical route. I was only ever interested in art and design, but I am smart enough to do med. I was considering pharmacy. I don’t know if this would be a good idea, though, or if I’d be able to keep that kind of job without giving up. I really just want something that I can be competent at and not get fired from, at this point. I’m not sure if I had bad luck with these companies, if design jobs just don’t suit my personality, or what. I also did games, 3D modeling, and some animation in college but those jobs are super competitive and hard to find and my skills aren’t industry-level. I have also been extremely socially isolated since graduating, only talking to my parents or my long-distance boyfriend. I don’t know what to do.